Help Stop the Harm
Workplace fear is an all too common experience
Talk to almost anyone willing to be candid and they can tell you about a time, either past or present, of harmful fear at work.
Those who suffered workplace fear in the past may still suffer post-traumatic stress from it. They may carry a residual sense of caution, insecurity, and anxiety that it might happen again. They may have an aversion to or be triggered by certain situations. They may have a reasonable unwillingness to step out and take risks. Even if they are psychologically safe and supported now, many people have learned that the workplace can be dangerous, and they carry that knowledge with them.
I heard from a colleague this week who is currently working in a positive, supportive workplace, one she described as loving with a truly caring and kind leader. She had previously worked in two very traumatic, abusive workplaces in a row. She has several colleagues on her new team who also come from negative work teams into a new more loving situation. All are having a difficult time accepting that the new leader and environment are for real and can be trusted. They are traumatized and struggling to feel safe now, even when they actually are safe. And their loving leaders are struggling to comprehend the level of fear and anxiety they carry and their hesitance to trust.
Others are currently experiencing workplace trauma today. It's not in the past; right now they are enduring humiliation on the job, risking physical injury, or trying to avoid sexual harassment. Some are kept apart or held back because of their ethnicity, race, or religion, not quite accepted, or blatantly discriminated against. Others feel unspoken suspicion or judgment as they are passed over again for opportunities. Still others are kept in the dark about how to navigate new workplace realities after a change and feel set up to fail. Still others have had their trust betrayed and don’t know where to turn now.
These workplace traumas are dehumanizing and can be all-consuming.
People in these fearful workplaces are anxious when they wake up. They dread going to work. They are on edge and uncertain throughout the workday, in a constant state of fight or flight. They fear going to team huddles. They fear submitting their work. They fear meeting with THAT manager. They fear walking into the lunchroom where they are subtly excluded from groups of colleagues. They are distracted trying to figure out how to meet unknown expectations without the right information. Lacking a sense of belonging or trust, they fear for their livelihood.
These workplace traumas cause disorders. Disorder for the individual. Disorder to the work. Disorder for customers. Disorder to families and communities.
Let’s unpack these disorders one at a time. First, disorder for the individual. Individuals suffering from trauma have difficulty concentrating and getting things done. Trauma and fear naturally impact one’s willingness to share ideas and take risks; we second guess ourselves. The fear eats away at peace of mind.
And individuals end up getting sick. They suffer from depression, insomnia, digestive disorders, heart disease, increased symptoms of diabetes, sickness from a suppressed immune system, and more. They may seek therapy to understand and cope with what’s happening. These physical and psychological impacts have serious, costly, and lasting consequences.
This trauma also causes disorder in the work, which ultimately creates disorder for customers. With low trust and belonging, compliance and punishment rule the day rather than shared responsibility. Work becomes chaotic as communication and collaboration disappear. Producing work of high quality takes a massive effort. Customer complaints increase. Problems are not solved; heck, they are not even identified. Who is going to speak up about problems in an atmosphere of fear? The focus is not on delivering value for the customer, but rather on personally surviving the day. Don’t get me wrong, people still get their jobs done, often heroically. But the extra creativity or exploration or risk needed to find new options or to break through to new levels of performance are unlikely.
Further, families and communities also suffer when their members experience trauma and fear at work. Fear comes home, impacting personal relationships. One’s capacity to interact or to find joy and meaning in hobbies is diminished. Their brains are awash with stress hormones that foster defensive responses, less creative problem-solving with children, and self-focus not the others-focus needed for generous interactions or contributions. In short, traumatic stress saps the life out of families, key relationships, and communities.
Pam's story
Pam’s story exemplifies the harmful impacts of fear at work. Pam (not her real name) had a job she loved and a supportive team. She’d always received great reviews. But when her trusted leader was promoted, a new, less experienced leader stepped in. That new leader created a sense of uncertainty. He did not clarify his expectations nor help her understand how the work was changing. He created insiders and outsiders. Pam was asked to leave meetings when it was time to discuss information that was relevant to her job and had been shared with her in the past.
“It’s time to set a new standard, to expect something more of ourselves, for ourselves and for each other. Instead, it is time to expect and create workplaces characterized by love. We must make trust, respect, empathy, compassion, and belonging the standard. We don’t have any time to lose. ”
Calling her out like this communicated that there was something wrong with her, and she was not trusted. She felt completely insecure in her job, uncertain about her place on the team, and doubtful of her ability to contribute. Other team members quietly empathized with Pam who ended up leaving and finding another organization where she could contribute and be successful.
The great resignation is full of Pam’s, with people who decided enough is enough. When faced with violations of their values like the mortality of the pandemic, the ongoing disparate and life-threatening treatment of people of color, the dissonance of a tone-deaf workplace, or the harsh expectations of a leader, the Pams of the world have decided to leave. They want more for themselves, more for their families, and more for their communities.
My Plea
The suffering caused by abusive, fearful workplaces is enormous. This layers on the suffering of the last two years, and the toll is enormous. It has a terrible impact immediately and it goes with them long into the future. The loss of creativity and problem-solving just when we need them the most is not tolerable.
Please understand that it doesn't have to be this way; we don't need to suffer like this. We can decide to be different for each other! When we turn away from fear and toward more loving practices and ways of being, we stop the harm. There may be a path of unlearning and learning involved. After all we have a lot of conditioning to overcome. But in making the choice to turn, we set a new direction that can make a tangible difference in the trajectory of our society.
It is time for the workplace standard to shift from fear to respect, empathy, compassion, appreciation, and belonging. Our communities, families, relationships, as well as our organizational success, depend on it.
Take one step today toward love and away from fear. Our lives and families and communities depend on it.
