Let them see you sweat
Did you see Brené Brown on 60 Minutes last night? If you missed it, take 15 minutes to watch it right now.
Her TED talk has been viewed 46 million times since 2010 and last night’s interview should be too. Seldom do we “all” view the same media anymore, so I’m heartened that of all the messages to be getting through, her message of vulnerability, of bravery, of getting real and leaning into our humanity is getting through.
That’s good because we need it right now.
Be Human
If anything is essential to our survival and well-being during this crisis, it is our humanity. Denying our humanity is a danger. It is dangerous to us personally and collectively because suppressing our human skills and connections will only exacerbate the impacts of stress on our brains and our bodies and prevent us from thinking clearly and acting wisely.
Accessing our humanity will lower our cortisol and adrenaline, get us out of fight-flight-freeze mode and into a more calm, composed state with access to our pre-frontal cortex and executive function. In this condition, we can solve problems and think more clearly, creatively, calmly.
Not Normal
If last week you were still one of those leaders or team members I’ve been hearing about on numerous Zoom calls who are trying to maintain some façade of normalcy, surely last week has shown that, 1) nothing is normal, and 2) it doesn’t help to pretend that it is.
The good news is you can show up differently this week. You can lead or team from your humanity this week. Your team needs to know and experience that you are plugged into your humanity and theirs. This will build trust.
Not Enough
It is taking an incredible effort to continue operations, to make all the myriad decisions around who’s essential, to arrange the logistics and policies so that people can work from home, or so that all the shifts of essential services are covered to keep things going in an increasingly dire situation. It’s too much and unreasonable. But it’s also not enough.
I’m sorry. It is hard to hear right now, but it’s not enough.
You are leading people. You are working with people. Really your people are all you’ve got. If there were ever a time when the “organization as machine” metaphor will not serve us, it is now. People cannot be used up like so many interchangeable parts. We need to think of the organization as it really is, an organism, made up of living, breathing humans one and all, you included.
And your people who are part of that living organism need you to be human. Not to fall apart or to melt down, but to bring forth your compassion and connection to care. That is not a waste of time but will instead feed each of you, strengthen you, help you going.
Many of you have been doing this. You’ve been…
checking in with team members who know you really care and want to know
reminding your managers to be human and support their team members
encouraging self-care, mindfulness, and resilience practices
supporting balance and acknowledging that productivity from home is not going to be the same
explicitly letting people know they don’t have to hide their kids, pets, or partners, and sharing yours.
encouraging your team members to support each other as part of their work
making it clear that you value their well-being
Difficult times are ahead and we will need each other, human to human, to make our way out of this time.
Authenticity Creates Trust
Remember that we really don’t trust each other’s façades but we trust each other’s humanity. I’m not talking about what Brown describes as “faux vulnerability.” But I am talking about having the courage to be authentically human and creating the context by your example for others to be human too.
Even if you are out of practice being human at work, it’s not too late. Start today.
And you probably have human-centered team members who are ready to help your team right now. You know who they are. Maybe you used to dismiss their attention to human needs as frivolous. Even if you’ve not valued these human qualities before, you need to now. Reach out and ask for their insights, instincts and guidance. They are ready to share essential human skills. Turn to them. Value them and they can help you and your team in this crisis.
Help for Working Alone Together: More Free Gatherings Available this Week
We have more Virtual Gatherings available this week and will be adding Hosts to offer more Virtual Gatherings in the weeks ahead. These sessions are designed to help you process the experience of this crisis and cultivate resilience, increase courage, lower stress, and strengthen emotional health. Find out more on our Gatherings page.
And if you need help bringing human care to your team, let me know: ahumanworkplace@makeworkmorehuman.com.
Love and safety to you.
